Monday, December 4, 2006

Stupid/Sensible

Sometime somethings actually make a lot of sense, but come from places you'd never expect . Check these lines from Kenny Dies
Man: [from the Make-A-Wish Foundation] I know! I'll bet you wanna meet Madonna, huh?

Kenny: [muffled] No. Fuckin' Madonna... [his words trail off and become unintelligible]

Man: What was that?

Kyle: He said Madonna is an old anorexic whore who wore out her welcome years ago, and that now she suddenly speaks with a British accent she thinks she can play guitar and she should go fuck herself. [the Foundation reps are stunned]

Madonna: [appearing in the doorway] Should I come in now?

Man: Um, not quite yet.

* Chef: Stan, sometime God takes those closest to us, because it makes him feel better about himself. He is a very vengeful god, Stan. He's all pissed off about something we did thousands of years ago. He just can't get over it! So he doesn't care who he takes. Children, puppies, it don't matter to him, so long as it makes us sad. Do you understand?

Stan: But then why does God give us anything to start with?

Chef: Well, look at it this way! If you want to make a baby cry, first you give it a lollipop. Then you take it away! If you never give it a lollipop to begin with, it would have nothing to cry about! That's like God, who gives us life and love and health, just so that he can tear it all away and make us cry. So he can drink the sweet milk of our tears! You see, it's our tears, Stan, that give God his great power.